Sometimes you’re listening when someone is talking and then they say something and it’s like the world stopped spinning for a second, everything grinds to a complete halt…everything just stops. And all you can hear for what seems like an eternity is the voice speaking but even louder you hear your own breath and the sound of your heart pounding.
And just as quickly as it all stopped, the world begins to turn again.
Talladega Nights is one of those beautiful, meaningful epic films full of lessons you can carry on into your life each and every day. Everything I know, I learned from Ricky Bobby and Cal.
They taught me positive affirmations like, “I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence” and to aim high, “You can’t have two number ones…” “‘Cause that would be eleven.”
And they taught me to pray and to think of Jesus as a figure skater, the lead singer of Skynyrd, in a tuxedo shirt or even as a mischievous badger. And today, just before the start of a meeting, someone handed me something that rattled my cage…if there hadn’t been witnesses, I would’ve sworn it was a dream, or maybe we just ate the bad acid and were all having the same visual and auditory hallucination…but thanks to Ricky Bobby, I paused to pray “Help me, Jesus, help me, Jewish God, help me, Allah, help me Tom Cruise…” because yeah, it’s gonna take all that and then some to erase from my brain what I held in my hand. WTF!
so maybe i’ve posted it before, but so fucking what? get your own blog and post whatever makes you laugh until you snort.
and then that randomly reminds me that when Scoot and I went to see Danzig in Knoxville, the entire show there was this guy behind us shouting, “Rock on, big Glenn, wooooooooooo!” so here’s Devil’s Plaything from Lucifuge, one of my favorites that starts out with that trademark crooning and rolls into the caterwauling that I love so much…If you don’t want pain, you don’t understand!
It’s funny how we make ourselves forget moments in time that were painful or upsetting and how we bury them way down deep…and if you remember one forgotten memory, you suddenly remember a hundred horrible things and then you wonder why the hell you stayed on that path so long when diving head first into a briar-filled ditch would’ve been smarter and safer than continuing to put one foot in front of the other going in the same direction.
But I digress, as always! The point would be if it feels wrong, like you’ve completely sold your soul, it can still be undone, it can always be undone. There’s no such thing as a point of no return unless you’ve let it go on until you’re six feet under. Amen.
Our beagle-T-Rex pup was amazed by the snow this morning, and he seemed to want to protect me from it. He was barking at it and eating it. And eating it. And barking and eating…he seemed pretty perplexed that the snow didn’t just run away in fear from his super fierce barking, that it instead kept cascading down on his head. I watched him bark at the snow and eat big mouthfuls for nearly thirty minutes! For his sake, I’m glad a lot of it has melted away…and we’ll let him believe that he barked it away.
It was determined this afternoon that I am indeed Snuffleupagus, the Snuffy of the 70’s and 80’s that was only be seen by Big Bird (it was ’85 or so before Elmo helped Big Bird reveal Snuffy to all the other Sesame Street residents).
I’m ok with this notion; I’ve got my Big Bird, Big Bird’s got my back, it’s all good.
What’s most important here in this super random train of thought is………………did you know that Mr. Snuffleupagus has a first name? Aloysius. Aloysius Snuffleupagus…and he has a kid sister named Alice that I’m also pretty amused by.
So there you have it. I am Aloysius Snuffleupagus. So be it.
I thought this was a good one following my motorcycle class and as I continue to work on my college studies:
Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.
– George Bernard Shaw
I’m super excited that I finished my motorcycle class on Sunday, and twenty four hours later, I’m still trying to thaw out. Saturday the rain poured down, followed by horrible chilling winds…Sunday I awoke to snow blowing around which finally cleared and left behind the horrible wind again. After two days out in the elements, I’m pretty sure that I’m still defrosting. Nasty weather.
But the class was fun, learning something new was terrific! When I learn something new that interests me, I can’t think about anything else, so all the stress and worry just evaporate. Even though I was physically exhausted at the end of the Saturday and Sunday, mentally I was absolutely jazzed! It was so terrific to move past the initial fear and trepidation of can I do this to hell yes I can totally do this.
And you never know when these skills will come in handy! Like, when I get one of those calls I get all the time requesting me to be Angelina Jolie’s stunt double for her next action flick since we look so very much alike and they say Oh, but you have to be able to ride a motorcycle for these scenes and I can be all like Tell Angie I’m in, no problem. Pretty cool! Or if I need to quit my dull day job and become a full time Power Ranger (I would like to be the Orange Ranger or possibly the Purple Ranger), having the ability to ride a motorcycle will put me to the top of the list of would-be power rangers!! New skills open doors, folks, yes indeed.
…how many days my home phone hasn’t been working?? Went to call my glorious cell phone provider with the home phone just now so I could be free to step through the part where I pull the battery out for the 808th time and yadda yadda…and apparently one of the cats has chewed through the phone cord. I can’t remember the last time we tried to use the home phone, so it could’ve been a week or more! My bad.
Maybe all the problems with my cell phone are actually part of a plot by the cats! Maybe they figure if they cut the home phone and disable the cell phone that they can overthrow me and rule the universe. Diabolical. They already have me bringing them food & water and cleaning up their poo, so taking over the universe is pretty close at hand…at paw.
I just want to say that I’ve devoted about 7 hours now to some issues with my cell phone both with phonetech support and in the store…and the issues still aren’t resolved and WTF?!? It’s enough to make a person scream. Am I supposed to give in and buy a new phone or something? My phone isn’t even a year old. ARG!