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I’ve noticed lately that to the outside world, how I show up isn’t quite good enough…and the well-meaning do-gooders of the world seem to have no problem telling me how I could improve. There are perhaps too many unfiltered ambassadors of helpfulness in my social circle right now. I didn’t ask for their advice, but golly, they sure are generous and overly direct with it. It’s overwhelming sometimes to get into my happy groove, my positive mindset, feeling unstoppable, and BOOM! There’s someone pointing out all the ways I could be better, look better, live better…and I’m not broken! I don’t want you to try to fix me.
One well-meaning do-gooder wants me to lose weight, take up a specific exercise regime and exist entirely on bars and powders and supplements, oh my! I hurt my ankle badly last year. I spent months in agony even when I was sitting down, only doing prescribed stretching and strength training exercises per doctor’s orders. I gained some weight, yup, but really, it’s been the lowest of my concerns. I have been permitted in the last couple weeks to finally go for walks (on level surfaces only!) after almost of a year of minimal movement. On my first walk, I was feeling so exhilarated to finally be able to move without white hot pain, feeling so giddy in the simplicity of taking literal steps forward. I am so proud and happy of standing on my own two feet!
Another do-gooder thinks I will go farther in my career if I put on “preppy” clothes. Hmmmmm. I wear professional clothes to my day gig, but I seldom wear suits. I am incredibly unproductive in a suit, struggling like a fidgety five year old forced into “church clothes.” In a suit, all I can think about it how I wish I was wearing something else! I’m feeling accomplished, professional, productive and effective in what I have on, thanks.
Still another do-gooder believes that I will never “find a man” if I continue to wear sneakers all the time. What!?! After several foot injuries and injuries to both ankles, all in the last decade, I’m pretty much on sneaker patrol all the time. I am confident that a loving, solid, trustworthy partner won’t care what shoes I wear. Is this really a thing? Do men only date women in stripper heels? I don’t think I’m buying what you’re selling.
I don’t need “fixing.” Sure, I’m a work in progress, ever changing, dynamic, but there’s nothing “wrong” with me. I like me. I loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove me, sneakers and all.
Seriously, if you need to change yourself to appease someone, they aren’t worth it anyway because they don’t like YOU. They like an idea of a different you. Not cool!