In staff review after review for years, I have given patient feedback, usually the same feedback: do this, or do that to get a better “score” next go ’round. The feedback gets harder, more strict, when the “do this and that” get ignored, because I have a boss, too. My reviews get reviewed. Think it through wherever you work: your boss probably has a boss or even multiple bosses. Policies, procedures, expectations, measurements, all up and down the line.
It’s not particularly cool to throw me under the bus for the feedback you received just because you didn’t like it. I am obligated to give it. It’s my job. If you goofed up something, need to improve something, it’s part of my role to note it, observe it. It’s my job. Blaming me is hurtful, because the word gets back to me every time. Writing down words on a review form to meet our company’s standard for feedback doesn’t mean I think you’re a crappy person: it’s just part of the process, part of the office circle of life. I am not “allowed” to say every single thing is awesome; I am obligated to find areas to improve and write them down on this form or that form or the new version of the new form for the new strategy in the new year…ya dig?
Being a boss or a supervisor or a leader or whatever you want to call it sucks. People shut you out, leave you out of fun things, treat you like the enemy. It’s lonely, truly. You seldom have lunch buddies in the office, and conversations stop when you walk into a room. People you barely know roll their eyes when you walk past. I have a boss, folks, and my boss has a boss, too. These policies and procedures are just the boundaries of our worklife, and not anything I invented to hurt anyone’s feelings. Cut me some slack; I didn’t come up with this game or the rules. I just want to get out of it all with as few scars as possible, same as you.