falling to pieces

I have been disillusioned.  I cried in traffic, wiping tears with my sleeves.  I was betrayed.  I was interrupted and shut down.  I was disappointed.  I was falling to pieces…

…All this in the span of a few hours in my workday this morning.

I am not cut out for a world of business where we say whatever it takes to seal a deal, but we don’t mean any of it.  I am not a person who views my coworkers as disposable, expendable.  Lies.  Bait and switch.  Bullshit knee deep by 9 AM.  Fake smiles over coffee.  This kind of business world is not okay by me; this is not who I am.

I don’t know if people are born able to spew lies to reach their goals or if they learn to lie on the way up the ladder in the world of work.  I don’t want to learn to lie and smile.  I want to be authentic.  I want to be human, be real, even at work.

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