So this morning, I was returning a loaner child bright & early, so we could go and get the next loaner child (I was meant to have more kids, but it didn’t play out, so we borrow extras all the time!) for our day’s adventure. I was running behind a little bit, given that loaner child number one and Minime were sleepy, grouchy and completely dragging ass. Didn’t have time to feed them a proper breakfast, so I cruised through the McD’s drive thru (“No, you’re getting whatever’s 2 for $2, shush!”) to grab them some chow and some caffeine for me. I ordered a bucket or a trough or a silo of the sacred and much needed Diet Dr. Pepper along with their breakfast and zoomed on down the road. After throwing biscuits over my shoulder to the younguns, I poke the straw in and take a big gulp of OHMYGAWDTHISISNOTWHATIORDEREDGROSSSSSSS sweet tea. I promptly spit most of it in the middle of the steering wheel, given that not only was it sweet tea which I do not drink, but it was still warm sweet tea, which ups the nasty ante about 110%. What I didn’t spit on the steering wheel I managed to spit into every napkin McD’s gave us. Blech! BLECH!
I don’t drink sweet iced tea. Or unsweetened iced tea. I’m sure I could lose my southern belle credentials over such an admission; I do, however, like grits, so I should be able to retain my standing. Even though I don’t drink it, I’ve done enough time in food service that I’m told I make a lovely pitcher of sweet tea in my own home…and if it’s very sweet and very very very cold, I can take courtesy itty bitty micro sips of sweet tea if that’s what I’m served at someone else’s house. But I surely can not drink it still warm when I was anticipating the fizzy goodness of a Diet Dr. Pepper bright and early on a Sunday morning.
I noticed on my road trip today, the middle of the steering wheel is still a touch sticky. I wonder if I can sue McD’s and have them detail my car? I’m going to call Joel Bieber right now…